Tag Archives: be you

You have permission to be FULL OF SELF….

images via changeyourenergyWhen I was growing up in Trinidad, I used to hear older people telling younger people (mainly younger girls) that “they were too full of themselves.”

Often times that phrase was followed by a swift beating…a lesson that would serve to “put you back in your place.”

I accepted it as truth, that women should NOT be full of self. That being full of self was boasting and bragging and evil and only the Devil made one do that.

I have CHANGED my mind!

Today, I am FULL OF SELF!

It took a lot of hard work to kick the old beliefs to the curb and watch the bus run over them and kill them in front if my eyes.
I began to change my mind when I began to believe that my gifts and talents were worthy of being shown.
I decided to stop hiding my light under a basket.

Lights and skills and talents need to be placed on high to do the best good.
What good is knowing how to sing and only singing to oneself?
What good is knowing how to lead and never taking the reins as the leader?

In case you were waiting for someone to give you permission to be Full of Self… I’m giving it to you now.

Go forth and be Full of your BEST SELF!

Will people say that you are bragging? Maybe.
Will people say you should be less in their face? Maybe.

The bigger question is…
What will you say to the talents and gifts that have been patiently waiting in the shadows?
Will you ask them to be quiet for another year or two or ten?

What if you ONLY have a few years left?

The truth is this. None of us know how much time we have left so we MUST use all that we have to make this world a better place.
One of my favorite quotes is from Erma Bombeck.

“When I stand before God at the end of my days, I want to say, I have nothing left I used it all.”

I want this to be my utterance also.

I invite you to use all your gifts and talents, start TODAY!


Love and light,


Behind the nose of a clown….


Ah…behind the nose of a clown. A clown can be anything.

Behind the nose of a clown, a clown can pour out compassion at a safe distance from others.

Behind the make-up of a clown, a clown’s inner feelings and personality are hidden.

Behind the costume of a clown, the body and physical attributes of that person disappears.

Being a clown, as we have all been, allowed us to do one thing….show love and compassion, nothing else.

What mask or costume do you hide behind as you go through your day?

My challenge to you in 2014….be your kindest, most caring, compassionate, loving self without a mask or costume.

Can you make people smile and connect with another person in “nakedness” of who YOU truly are?

Faberge or Fauxberge?

images via shutterpointA few weeks ago I attended the Faberge exhibit at the Houston Museum of Natural Science.

Turns out the collection belonged to someone who started quite by accident.

The first piece that the collector bought turned out to be a fake (hence Fauxberge) and that mistake put her on a quest to educate herself about the authentic Faberge pieces.

She spent thousands of hours and as many dollars learning as much as she could about the art and hired many specialists to help her to identify real from fake.


How can this story possibly be connected to you?

Have you ever been called names or been told you were insensitive or mean. Have you ever been accused of turning your back on someone?

Have you ever accepted the accusations as real?

If you have, you have accepted the false or fake you that the other person is seeing.

You can say that they have FAUXED you! Yes, I just made up that word. It is pronounced “fawd”.

They have “sold” and you may have “bought” the false and unflattering description of you.


Who can you turn to for authentication?

The best source is, of course, YOU. However, sometimes you may be feeling so bad that you cannot be your own best friend. This is when you turn to others who are the “learned” in the field of life.

This could be a trusted friend, family member or a coach.

Each of these people can reflect to you a truer sense of who you are. Each of these individuals will release you from the choke-hold of the false beliefs.

It really is worth the investment of time and maybe dollars to investigate your true and sacred nature.

Don’t be fooled by people who try to paint you with unflattering strokes.

Be brave and stand up to these thieves of your divine self and stand in your authenticity.

If you would like a tried and true way to uncover your beautiful values go to www.viasurvey.org and take the free test.


Love and light,



A message in a bottle….

dallas nagata white.2011.message in a bottle.ed via hapahaleTwenty years ago, my mode of communication to call up and down the coast of the Mexican Caribbean was a marine radio. There were no phones. I drove to people’s houses if I wanted to talk to them and we had conversations because we had not seen each other in days, weeks or sometimes months. I left notes on the door if no one was home. Once a month, I made a collect call to the good ol’ US of A to let my parents know I was still alive.

Three years later, I stood huddled around a CRT screen at a “caseta” (a room with public phones) watching the internet immerge and I remember how amazed I was at how the green characters on the screen almost suddenly appeared on another computer as an “email”. This new thing called the internet made electronic messaging, information and business all happen for me. I learned to write web pages to give information to people about this area I loved, the Riviera Maya. It started as a hand full of web pages and daily emails, driving to Tulum each day to connect to a blessed phone line.

At lightning speed, a few web pages turned into hundreds and I spent my days answering people’s questions and connecting with them. A world of communication that spanned the globe allowed all of us to touch one another.

Communication now is a status update on Facebook, 140 characters on twitter, text messages by phone, no need to hear a voice or be heard. We send out messages that many can see, but is anyone listening?

My profession is communications, yet I can sometimes feel alone in this connected world as perhaps others do. The geek in me loves the speed, ease and technology of communication. However, what I am trying to do now, when I do connect with someone (especially if it is face to face) is to be present and look at them in the eyes and smile from my heart.

I have used the electronic gadgets as my shield to protect myself from allowing people to get too close.

Yet ironically, I want nothing more than to be able to be authentic, open and truly be me around others.

My question to you….are the messages that you’re sending just part of the millions of other messages floating around in an electronic sea in hopes of making a connection with someone?

De-friending fear…


Oh how Facebook has reduced us to junior high feelings all over again.

online drama via living.msnThose feelings weren’t that great the first time around. Now they are possibly worse because, on top of the same old teenage insecurities floating to the surface we have that feeling that OMG, really, I am a grown adult and am so emotionally involved in who is my friend or not on Facebook.

REALLY? Grow up!

The inner monologue goes something like this:
Will you be my friend?
Did you like my post?
Why did not you like my photo?
Why didn’t you comment on my post on your wall?
How come you didn’t Facebook me?

The inner voice is louder now: “What’s wrong with me that you do not want to be my friend or like the shit I post?”

Any of these statements ring true to you?

I shake my head in wonder of myself.
I recently had to de-friend someone who I thought was my friend but who did not act like my friend.

My finger hovered over the button to click as I planned on de-friending that person.
Oh the shame to de-friend….
The shame that I did not want to be their friend.
The shame that I was being mean or I was acting like a bitch.
The shame I would hurt their feelings.
The shame that as much as they wanted to be my friend…..I did not want them to be mine.
But the shame is that other person did not respect me, my rules, terms, conditions or non-conditions (as the case may be) of being MY friend.

Why should we feel shame de-friending someone who is not being a friend.

I click “de-friend”. I did it.

Oh the guilt. I have been de-friended and I know what it feels like to be de-friended. It’s like HEY I thought we were friends what the HELL is wrong with you to de-friend me? What did I do wrong?
Oh the guilt, will they call, text or email me asking me why? What will I say?
The guilt if I made someone feel less of a person because I did not want to be their friend.

It is amazing how this thing called Facebook can evoke these and so many emotions.
There is my Facebook friending insecurities rant.

Now I have one less friend….so friend me, I have a spot to fill!