Tag Archives: failure

We are THEY…

In the book I Thought It Was Just Me…(but it isn’t), Dr. Brene Brown cautions us to not divide the world into US and THEY.

We have all experienced loss, addictions, failures, etc. To draw a random line around the mistakes that THEY make VS the mistakes the WE make makes no sense.
The only thing it does is keep us separated from seeing the other as being human and needing empathy and compassion just as much as we do.

How many groups of THEY do you recognize in your own life?
Different religions?
Different cultures?
Different side of the tracks?
Different skin color?
Different accents?
Different sexual orientations?

The list of THEY is endless, isn’t it?

Does the list make you feel safe?
Does the list allow you to stereotype more easily?
Does the list allow you to be a better bully?

Can you ever be SURE that the beliefs you hold about all the groups of THEY are true?
If you cannot prove it, why continue to believe it?

Perhaps this week you can stick your toe into a shallow pool of a THEY group, perhaps you will find something quite surprising. Perhaps you will find someone who feels quite like you.
Someone who has fears like you.
Someone who loves and wants the best for their kids, much like you.
Someone who reads bedtime stories to their kids at night, like you.
Someone who has been betrayed by life, like you.
Someone who just wants to be understood, like you.

I hope you take a chance. I hope you are sweetly surprised.

Love and light,

The SCALE said…

The SCALE said…you are a failure.

The month of June 2012 had been magical both personally and professionally.
I embarked on a great training regimen of biking, pilates, dance and fast walking.
I began to have a renewed awareness of what went into my mouth. I tried to reduce “eating meditations” and instead, focused on “chewing meditations.” I chewed slower and tried to be aware of the flavors and the textures of the food while being grateful for strong teeth that facilitated healthy chewing. I put down the knife and fork between bites, to savor the food in my mouth and not have the other bite hovering.

I increased my community service by joining some boards. My Live a Brighter Life training program had officially launched and my beautiful, sleek new training manuals were in hand. My family was healthy and my kids were happy.

Then…. I returned from one of my weekends in Atlanta and I stepped on the scale!

Immediately all if the above disappeared from my mind because I had not lost any weight.

I heard that old familiar voice in my head, “Ummm…..so you are still fat and you think you’re doing so much exercise. When you’re speaking in front of groups of people they probably think you’re too fat to know anything.”

I was amazed at how quickly I began to criticize myself and how eager I was to believe the lies.

So I stopped and thought about how GOOD I am.

I had to remind myself that my work is making a needed difference in the lives of women who are suffering from DV.

I had to remind myself that my energy levels are up and that my body is working well and supporting me in my work.

I had to remind myself that I am doing my best at this moment and I will continue to do my best.

I had to remind myself that a few numbers on a scale does NOT define me.
I define me.

I wanted to tell you this little story because I know that this has probably happened to you as well.

When you hear those familiar voices putting you down…STOP them!
Begin a list of all the good things that you are doing.
Write them down and read them over and over and BELIEVE them.

If you don’t pull yourself out of that darkness, no one will.

Love and light,