Monthly Archives: January 2012

Angry, humorless or just plain bitchy

“… strong professional women of all races are at risk of being classified as angry or humorless or just plain bitchy. Studies have shown that men who get angry are often rewarded in their career, while women who express anger tend to be penalized.” -Ilyse Hogue.

This quote hardly needs any more explanation… except for HOW to handle this in our lives and in the work place. The way we treat anger personally and professionally is directly related to HOW we were taught to react by our parents or guardians. I remember very clearly that shouting and screaming were par for the course in my family of origin, but only for the adults, we kids would get slapped if we said a word.

As I grew up, every time someone yelled at me, even though I was an adult I felt childlike and immediately clamped up. I evolved into being the shouter and the yeller until I realized that I was only harming myself.

It is quite easier to “control” ourselves at work, as the social norm is to go along to get along.

What happens if you do let loose and people start labeling you? Can you open the conversation with them about the labels?

Not really, BUT you can open the conversation about the labels they put on others. This way you are just creating a small crack in the social façade and your wisdom can shine a light thru the crack.

So try standing up for others and you will feel a lot better even if you don’t have anyone to stand up for you.

 

Love and light

Indrani

P.S. I did notice that people brought their problems to me to solve because I was that Bitch who wouldn’t take crap. Interesting, don’t ya think?

 

Maya Angelou says…

Maya Angelou

When a person shows you who they are, believe it the first time.
Truer words were never spoken but are they ever hard to remember.
I was teaching a class called Live a Brighter Life this week to a group who had the courage to step out of abusive relationships. All around the room I see bright eyes and beautiful smiles and brilliant minds and women who believe Dr. Angelou’s quote.
The first time someone disrespects you BELIEVE IT!
Do not judge yourself for “not being good enough”. Know that their actions reflect their thoughts and are a reflection on them.
Your job is to find a safe way to get out of harm’s way and find solace.
Take small steps into your Brighter Life.
Love and light
Indrani

Step closer for a better view.

Homeless Sweet Homeless 2 by Pandaphobia

I have seen homeless people at a distance. 
But I took a step closer and this is what I saw.
 
I did not see dirty people
I saw people who looked their best.

I did not see uncaring
I saw people asking about one another.

I did not see solitude
I saw kinship. 

I did not see withdrawal
I saw openness.

I did not see disconnection.
I saw bonding.

I did not see isolation.
I saw communicating.

I did not see self-pity.
I saw self-regard.

I did not see unmotivation
I saw determination

I did not see dumbness
I saw intelligence

I did not see fear
I saw courage.

I did not see aggression.
I saw friendliness.

I did not see disregard.
I saw appreciation.

I did not see scowling faces.
I saw smiles.

 
What I saw? Human beings just like me.

 
Do you have the courage to take a step closer to someone or something to get a better view?